It's that time of year again! Tonight is the Auction for the organization where we went to counseling after losing Ethan. You might remember we were part of their video last year. This time of year brings back memories of a dark time in our lives. I am so proud of how far we have come, but mostly how far I have come. When I think back to those first days after our loss, I wasn't sure how I would be able to continue on. But I did and I have and I know that I am a much better wife, mother and friend because of Ethan. Lately I have been reading several blogs of other moms who have lost a baby. It seems so easy for them to pinpoint God's blessings...and some of these mothers have some pretty awesome stories. I sometimes get down and wish I could have a story like theirs. I find myself wondering do I just not see it. Am I missing something that God is calling me to do? I am praying for God to show me a way to keep Ethan in our family and to give Ethan's life a greater purpose...one that will touch others and show the glory of God.
Anyway, I say this because one of those blogs is Angie Smith. Wife of Todd from Selah...who will be at the auction tonight! I am so hoping that she will be there. I really just want to give her a hug and thank her for the ministry of her blog. They lost a daughter several years ago and the blog is her journey. It's called Bring the Rain. I have been inspired and learned so much from her.
I will post again if I get to meet her! I will take my camera just in case. I better go get ready. The babysitter will be here in 30 minutes! YIKES!